After volunteering for Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep at the same hospital for several years, I developed fairly close relationships with several of the Labor and Delivery nurses - meaning, if they ask me to be somewhere, I’m there. Working closely with these woman in birth and death, side by side, connects them to me in a way that is precious, so I’m always happy to help when needed.

Since the crazy work schedule of nurses doesn’t allow for much time to chat, I’m used to quick text messages in order to communicate. So when my phone actually rang, I was sure to pick up. ‘I have a favor to ask…’

Baby Lily was scheduled to be born via cesarean section at a specific date and time, which wasn’t unusual; but after being diagnosed with a condition (Trisomy 18) that would likely mean she wouldn’t survive the actual birth - if she even survived that long - put much more on the line when it came to her birth. With so much uncertainty, her parents wanted to make sure that every moment of her life was celebrated and captured.

‘I know this falls outside of the typical Now I Lay Me Down the Sleep volunteer photography guidelines and I honestly have no idea what the outcome is going to be - but would you consider photographing the birth?’

With clearance from the medical team for me to be present in the room during the c-section (due to many medical factors, it’s rare for a Doula or Birth Photographer to be allowed in the room during this procedure), I was committed with no second guessing at all.

Lily being born is one of the biggest miracles I’ve ever witnessed in my life. As we all prepped that morning for her arrival, the atmosphere was a familiar one to me: anticipation, confusion, vulnerability, cautious hope, sadness, fear, and encouragement for one another filled the room with barely a word spoken. On the one hand, hearing a sigh, the slightest whimper of a cry, would be an overwhelming moment to celebrate; but knowing even that may be too much to ask was cause for the room to feel collectively as though it were holding its breath.

When babies are born with a short life expectancy, moments to celebrate don’t come with the cheer that would normally take place. With each breath of air, blink of an eye, slight movement of a finger there is a long pause, trying to savor the moment, overcome with joy to witness more than you ever feared possible but also tracking whether or not this will be the last.

As baby Lily cried out during her birth (a small squeak that sounded like a roar) the room rushed with a brief moment of joy and waited for the next sound. The medical professionals moved quickly to allow Lily’s Mom a moment to see her but give her the immediate medical care needed. I kept up with the team and Lily’s Dad, staying close, but keeping my distance.

In the back of the operating room was a door that lead to a side room, where machines began testing Lily’s heart, oxygen, and other survival measures. We all stood around Lily as she began to decline, amazed at her strength and our ability to spend this much time with her but also acknowledging there wasn’t much left, as the numbers on the screen began to lower and her movements quickly slowed.

Enough information was gathered in a matter of moments to wrap Lily back up and take her back to her mother, who was in the final stages of being stitched. Lowering the neckline of her gown, she was able to be placed skin to skin on her mother’s chest. And we waited.

But that’s all we did.

Despite Lily declining when she was in the back room, she was now changing before our eyes as she lay skin to skin on her mothers chest. We watched and listened to her breaths, almost monitoring the depth and distance between each one, smiled with every attempted cry, and slowly - so slowly - began to realize we may have more time with her. Heart to heart with her mother, she began improving.

“Lily’s story has been far from what we expected.”

Shortly after, everyone was wheeled back to the recovery room where extended family had been nervously waiting to hear details about her arrival: grandparents, aunts, uncles, and big brother surrounded and quietly took turns meeting Lily. Several doctors and nurses came in to warmly assess her health, she was baptized, and it was clear there was no need for me to stay longer. Though it was early, it appeared Lily was going home.

Several months later, I received an email from Lily’s father. I don’t often hear from the families I volunteer for, so I was thrilled to hear his update:

“Hi Teresa,

I just wanted to give you an update on Lily. I’m sure there are many/most cases with your work with Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep that have very sad endings. As you know that is what we expected with Lily. But Lily’s story has been far from what we expected.

Lily will be 4 months old on Saturday. The first couple of months were rough. There were several times where she was just barely clinging on to life. But she is a fighter and has really pulled through. After several surgeries, she seems like she is here for the long haul. Her underlying condition is still there, and there will still be many challenges to come, but she seems like that is ok with her to keep going.

I am sending you this because you were there at such an important point of Lily’s and our lives. It meant so much to have the moments of her arrival captured, especially since we didn’t know how many moments we would have with her. Thank you so much for that.”

To bear witness to such a powerful story is something I will carry with me my entire life. I know the families I have served (over 50 at the time of this article) don’t realize how often I think of them or the impact their children have had on my life - but I mean from the depth of my soul when I say, ‘It’s been an honor to have met your child. Thank you.’

If you would like more information on how you can help families experiencing pregnancy and/or infant loss, please consider these organizations:

• The Dakota Lee Foundation

• Let Grace In

• Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture. Currently accepting new clients for Doula services and Birth Photography.

 The Birth Conversation Series is held on my Instagram account and allows people to talk about their own birth experiences, in addition to work they may do in the birth community. Below is a recap of my conversation with Stephani, a mother of four. You can find the entire interview here. 

In the midst of COVID-19, I talk with Stephani who has gone through four births. Like a lot of conversations I host, the details are different but they are more the result of two underlying factors in birth: community and conversation.

“I thought the hospital would help me with my birth plan.” Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co.

Stephani’s births all involved being at the hospital, having an epidural, and several family members close by. Despite having what some would consider a ‘routine’ hospital birth, she describes the unknowns, the confusion, and the lack of choices she felt she had. 

“It wasn’t until the end of my first pregnancy that I finally asked my doctor if we were ever going to discuss my birth plan. He sort of looked at me and said, ‘Why? Was there something you wanted?’ I thought the hospital was going to educate me on what my options were and it never happened.”

While every birth story contains its own unique details, the general outcome often comes from how much - or how little - we have been exposed to and what we are ‘allowed’ to choose when it comes to how our bodies labor and birth. While Stephani didn’t feel her births were ‘bad’, she recognizes that she may have made different choices and had a different perspective had she been encouraged and educated on what preferences were offered, long before her pregnancy even began. 

“I thought the hospital or my doctor would talk to me about how I wanted to birth.”

— Stephani F

Similar to being educated on pregnancy, we also talk about the lack of conversation surrounding postpartum: physically, mentally, and emotionally. After suffering a year with postpartum depression before being diagnosed, Stephani reflects on what could have helped before things felt out of control. 

For our full conversation, visit my youtube channel here and follow along on Instagram Live as we discuss pregnancy during COVID-19 and join our community chats whether you live in Hawaii or anywhere in the world.

Stephani talks about her thoughts on lack of education / communication in regards to pregnancy and birth. Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co.

Have questions about birth?

I would love to answer them! Not even sure what to ask? That’s ok too. Never hesitate to reach out to a Birth Worker to simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture.

 The Birth Conversation Series is held on my Instagram account and allows people to talk about their own birth experiences, in addition to work they may do in the birth community. Below is a recap of my conversation with Amber Elliott of Amber Elliott Couture Photography. You can find the entire interview on my here. 

After a misdiagnosed infection, a traumatic surgery left Amber bed ridden for 2 years with the instruction that becoming pregnant would not be physically possible. 10 years later, she became pregnant with her first son. 

“I was designated high risk and because of that, at least where I live (Canada), you essentially feel like your rights are taken. They dictate what type of doctor you see, which for me was high risk...and I felt bullied throughout the entire process, all the way up until my son was born. He was born healthy, I gave a vaginal delivery, and it was a horrible experience. It was a horrible experience through the Obstetrician appointments, through the labor and birthing process - just the entire system. The system put on more stress and pressure than anything else. I had a Birth Doula and a Postpartum Doula throughout that process and I believe that was probably the one thing that got me through it.”

“I didn’t want to be told and dictated how to have my pregnancy.” Amber shares her fight to take control of her own birth. Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co.

Four year later, Amber became pregnant again and insisted that this birth was going to be different. Trusting her instincts, advice from her sister (a nurse), consulting with her general practitioner, and discussing her intentions with her previous birth doula, a plan was formed: minimal doctors appointments, midwife, and water birth. 

What may seem like less ‘work’ turned into a mission to stay empowered and in control of her body during this birth: Amber eventually found a midwife that was willing to work with her; but not until she first prepared a presentation for the hospital board where she would give birth. Under the health care system Amber was under, midwives were not allowed to deliver high risk pregnancies. After a successful meeting, she was told she was the first high risk pregnancy allowed to include her midwife. 

“Is birth something we’re just supposed to survive?”

— Amber Elliott

Amber and I discussed her obstacles and how they may relate to the quickly changing world of birth today (this article is being written in the few several weeks of the COVID-19 outbreak). Though Amber had a plan for her birth and she had a healthy vaginal delivery, things didn’t go as planned for labor. I asked her for advice or guidance to others facing change in their delivery: 

“Don’t allow anything to distract you and don’t look at the big picture too much. Focus on the first thing in front of you - otherwise it can be really overwhelming. Write down the areas where those gaps are and start one by one in tiny little steps into resolving each one for yourself because you really do have the power.

“Why would you submit your body to someone who treats your body horribly?” After a traumatic surgery, followed by a traumatic birth, Amber shares her thoughts on taking control of her pregnancy. Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co.

There are many people on your team when you're pregnant: Your partner is on that team, your doula is on that team, your midwife or Obstetrician, General Practitioner, your parents, your children, all of them are on your team. And they all should be working in tandem.

I had a perfect vision of how I wanted to give birth and it didn’t go that way...but it doesn’t matter. At the end of the day you should feel empowered, supported, loved, and you feel you have a right to voice a concern, request, anything to anybody and that you and your baby are safe.”

I would love for you to listen to my full interview with Amber here. Also, keep checking my Instagram page for more live interviews - I would love to have you on, as well! 

Have questions about birth?

I would love to answer them! Not even sure what to ask? That’s ok too. Never hesitate to reach out to a Birth Worker to simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture.

If you are ready to give birth, I know things may feel pretty scary right now. You may even feel like you have no control over what happens to your own labor and delivery - but I want to assure you that doesn’t need to necessarily be the case.

On my dedicated Instagram page for birth, I am going to be holding a series of conversations from people who are about to give - or have just recently given - birth. Today I really wanted to start things off by getting into the bare basics of what your birth may (or may not) look like. A starting point for trying to wrap your mind around what you are hoping to have take place and what you know your possible other options may be.

This template can help break down the basics of considering your birth options during uncertain times.

The video itself is best to listen to when you have some time to focus. So until then, above is a brief overview of what is discussed and how you can take what feels like an incredibly overwhelming situation and break it down.

Even if you don’t plan on giving birth in Hawaii or the island of Oahu, please know that I am a resource here for you to help in anyway I can.

Have questions about birth?

I would love to answer them! Not even sure what to ask? That’s ok too. Never hesitate to reach out to a Birth Worker to simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture.

As the world has been watching the last several weeks play out, I have personally been reacting to current events like breathing: Take everything in, get the bad stuff out, fluidly move on to the next experience, repeat. Every so often take a quiet, intentional moment to reassess how everything feels, appreciate that there is perfection happening in details so minuscule that I can’t even identify, and adjust my stance if I recognize I could be improving how things function.

It’s easy to look at others and wish we had the view as them; but sometimes, if we would just gift ourselves a moment or two, we would see we have access to the same things. (View of sunrise over the water.) Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co. in Hawaii.

Due to the world of social media, t’s been pretty incredible to almost be a fly on the wall for so many; suddenly, what people value has come to surface in unexpected ways. Having said that, things people don’t value has been just as eye opening. Watching so many intimate, unique details of lives play out, I’ve almost been appreciative to have the expanded insight to understand what is individually important to people, how they respond, what emotions require more support from others, and identify opportunities to step in to help in ways that may seem small to me but play a bigger, more important roles to another person. 

As I continue to put focus on the birth community in my career, I recognize and appreciate the similarities of how each day brings subtle changes with, at times, major consequences both negative and positive. The need to be open minded and understand when someone is feeling uncomfortable vs. in crisis mode. Acknowledging that there may not seem like much of a difference to others looking in. Recognizing that while a small shift may have contributed to feeling out of control, an equally small shift can reign comfort, confidence, and assurance back just as quickly. Finding an appropriate way to contribute to a positive outcome when it feels like there’s a road block at each turn. 

Consideration of these things make me realize what calls me to be a Birth Doula, the attention required in helping others with seemingly ‘routine’ tasks that may need a little unforeseen attention and care along the way. I keep thinking about these two (separate) phrases:

“Just stay home!”

“Just have a baby!”

Appreciating the details. Tree of Life from the series Mele Ma'i (Procreation Chants). Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co. in Hawaii.

The simplicity that surrounds the initial thought of each...until you begin to consider the intimate details that ultimately play a major factor in how pleasurable vs. traumatizing each can potentially play out. While some may leave it to happenstance, others will proactively work on a plan that allows more controlled, favorable outcomes to be experienced. Not that there won’t need to be some adjustments along the way but knowing that should things not go as planned, it will be easier to improvise and move to Plan B. 

All of this to say, we are each going through some decisions we didn’t anticipate, inconveniences to our ideal day to day, and  circumstances beyond our control. Especially if you are able to give birth, your world may be feeling like it’s completely flipped over. If this applies to you and you are nervous about where you had originally planned to give birth, not having the support around you that had been anticipated, or just what life is going to look like with a newborn in general when ‘normal’ has already gone out the window - please reach out to me.

You have my promise that I will not 

1. Attempt to make decisions for you.

2. Pretend to have all of the answers.

What I will do is listen - and, should you want help researching information or considering different labor and birthing options, suggest some pretty incredible people in the birth community that may be able to make some possible choices feel less scary. 

If you aren’t pregnant but happen to resonate with this article in a different way, still reach out. Life can be really complicated and overwhelming; starting with a conversation may not be the instant resolve to everything but it’s a step in the right direction. Just know you don’t have to ‘push through’ - and certainly not alone.

Have questions about birth?

I would love to answer them! Not even sure what to ask? That’s ok too. Never hesitate to reach out to a Birth Worker to simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture.

Photographing Your Birth story

One of the top three questions I receive in regards to Birth Photography (especially from soon to be Dads) is, ‘Who in the world would want to see these photos?! I’m certainly not posting these on our Holiday Cards!’

If you promise to keep reading and allow me to explain, I’ll tell you a little secret: Maybe you will post a few photos for family and friends to see.

But let’s back up a bit.

Whether you are having a hospital birth, home birth, c-section, a skilled Birth Photographer can capture your birth story in ways that you will cherish forever. Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co. in Hawaii.

For some, Birth Photography may seem like a fad, or something new that is being offered when, it has actually been around for a number of years.

It was almost a decade ago when I was preparing to give birth to my second child. Another Photographer friend of mine (B. Billick Photography of Kentucky) mentioned the possibility of photographing my daughter’s arrival. I had never heard of the concept before but I knew I was in, always willing to try something new in the name of art.

The concept was fresh to both of us and with her living 6 hours away we weren’t quite sure how to iron out the logistics (my husband was in the Army at the time, deployed through the pregnancy, and we were nowhere near family or friends). I adored my OBGYN at the time and had no qualms bringing it up to him: “Would there be any issue with my friend coming in to photograph the birth?”

It was almost an instant, “Sure.” Then, “Wait...is this a friend you want in the room who will happen to take photos? Or are you actually hiring a Photographer? This definitely isn’t the time for that - you aren’t going to want to document what is going on down there.”

Oh.

Looking back, it’s certainly not as though I think his reaction is odd; this is a common first reaction to people who are introduced to Birth Photography. Having said that, do I regret not going through with it? 110% . In addition, I wish he had a little more confidence in me, my body, and how awesome the birth process was.

How I birthed my three children is another story for another time (hint: one of the reasons I began looking into becoming a Doula) and what I wouldn’t do to have that moment documented when my daughter and I saw one another for the first time. The expression of joy on my husbands face. How we smiled at one another when it was confirmed that everyone was healthy.

Birth Photography isn’t just labor and delivery - it’s also about capturing that moment when Mom meets baby for the very first time. Oahu, Hawaii Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co. in Hawaii.

Things to Consider Before Hiring a Birth Photographer in Hawaii

Do some of my clients want every single detail - and I mean, ALLLLLLLL the details - of their birth story documented? Yes; and they are beautiful. But do I also have clients who simply want the labor and immediate post delivery photographed? Absolutely; and they are beautiful. The bottom line is, everyone’s birth journey is just as important and special.

Because there are so many choices, feelings, and ‘backup plans’ involved in birth, is one of the reasons I spend so much time talking with my clients before hand. We discuss comfort levels, birth plans, expectations, and boundaries. I also make sure your birth team - especially your partner - is supportive of my being there.

Whether you are new to the idea of Birth Photography, considering if it is right for you, or simply curious to know more, I encourage you to reach out to multiple people in the birth world, on your birth team, or myself.

Having a Birth Photographer in addition to the rest of your birth team allows you and your partner to focus on each other while laboring. Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co. in Hawaii.

Have more Birth Photography questions?

I would love to answer them! Not even sure what to ask? That’s ok too. Never hesitate to reach out to a Photographer to simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

Simply fill out this form and I will be in touch (and I will NEVER pass along your info - pinky swear).

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture.

Moving to Hawaii isn’t just a novelty for me. Though not of Hawaiian ancestry, I have a deep connection to the land, absolute respect for the culture, and do my best to educate myself and advocate for the aina (land) and people. Several friends here have requested that I dig deeper into my roots, my own history, to understand where this connection comes from. While I’m not certain I’ll ever discover all that I’m looking for, I credit my grandmother, Ina, for allowing me to inherit what gifts she did have. This post was written about her in 2017; on this anniversary of her passing, I’d like to reintroduce her to you.

Sitting on 80 acres of land previously owned by American Indian tribes, around the large wood table built by my great-great relatives (which is in my home today), my childhood Saturday nights often took place in my grandmothers 60 year old home, filled with adults playing Eucre and kids watching Hee-Haw. In the summer time, we would be left to play unsupervised in the fields searching for arrowheads or the creek where we would attempt fishing with string and safety pins; in the winter I have a distinct memory of us discovering that when we turned on the ceiling vent in the bathroom, snow would start blowing down on us.  We were an extended family of great laughter and little wealth.

As a young married couple, my parents had us move quite a bit in effort (and success) of building and providing a good life for us but in the center of it all stood the stability of my grandmother’s home. From it came stories of my father as a baby climbing out to the barn and up the rafters; my aunt being Homecoming queen; marriages starting and ending; babies being born. And in the middle of it all, my grandmother’s high school senior portrait would hang, smiling down on all of us.

Oahu Photographer and Doula holds a self portrait of her grandmother, who she credits her connection to the Hawaiian land. Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co. in Hawaii.

I loved to study this portrait of a young woman that, at the time, had such a full life waiting for her. As a young girl, it intrigued me to see how different she looked back then – yet have the same kindness & determination in her eyes. To think, when she had the portrait taken, none of us were even born yet! To have this reminder of my grandmother at a time when we didn’t know her, to see the same beautiful smile she would give us when we came to her home, was almost a sweet declaration to me, saying, “So much came before you, to guide you and shape you. I was a young girl like you, too”. This simple, hand painted photograph let my mind wonder so often as to how much more we were connected to one anther, despite the years.

My grandmother’s portrait now sits besides me as I work. I still think about what she was like at my age, if I received any of her personality traits, and if I will pass them to my own children.  I love the opportunity to share small snippets of stories with people who ask, “Who is that a portrait of?” and smile, knowing that she would be proud to know the woman I am today, the women I am raising, and would more than likely shrug off the suggestion that she had anything to do with it – let alone her high school senior portrait be a token of security, roots, and inspiration to generations ahead.

Would You Like to Be Photographed with Your Family in Hawaii?

I would love to talk to you more. Simply fill out the form below and we can start a conversation and think about what would ultimately make the perfect session for you.

Simply fill out this form and I will be in touch (and I will NEVER pass along your info - pinky swear).

Teresa lives on the island of Oahu in Hawaii and works as a Family Photographer, Birth Photographer, and Doula. In addition to client work, Her award winning Fine Art series ‘Mele Ma’i: Procreation Chants’ can be found here and is a volunteer Bereavement Photographer with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep

It was my absolute joy to recently be asked to photograph a pregnancy announcement for a woman in Hawaii who has chosen to be a Surrogate. From the initial conversation to actually photographing the IVF needles that were used for her to go through the process (which she assures me is actually not that many) I am in complete awe and amazement to have a sneak peek into this birth story. 

When it came time to photograph this image, I was a little selfishly excited; commercial photography was my first love when I was in photography school and I was looking forward to taking my time in the set up and perfecting each detail. Combining that with the subject of birth made it all the better. 

Image of IVF needles in heart shape taken to announce pregnancy for Hawaii surrogate mother. Photograph by Teresa Robertson of Robertson & co. in Hawaii.

But as I focused on each detail, carefully removed, delicately placed, and positioned each IVF needle I felt the important role each item played: How each carried hope, each signified loss, each triumphantly came together to create a life already loved beyond words. When working as a Doula or photographing birth, I often (and sincerely) comment on the honor I have playing a small role in new life. This project brought me even more appreciation, seeing a completely new perspective on the many, many details, consideration, and love that were planned - long before this pregnancy was real. 

I’m slowly learning more about the world of surrogacy, reading stories, even finding out that it is not even legal in every state. If you have gone through this journey, I would love to hear more about your experience. If you live in Hawai’i (where surrogacy is legal), please visit the Hawai’i Surrogacy Center website. General information in regards to Surrogacy in other states can be found here. 

HAVE MORE BIRTH PHOTOGRAPHY or Doula QUESTIONS?

I would love to answer them! Not even sure what to ask? That’s ok too. Never hesitate to reach out and simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

Simply fill out this form and I will be in touch (and I will NEVER pass along your info - pinky swear).

Teresa Robertson is a Studio Photographer, Family Photographer, and Birth Photographer located on the island of Oahu in Hawaii. After years of volunteering for families whose children did not survive pregnancy or childbirth, she has also worked as a Birth Doula (DONA trained). 

When my family moved to Hawai’i (O’ahu to be exact) I knew that really determining what would stay and what would come with us was pretty important to our new way of living. What was a little harder to figure out was what to do with my photography studio and everything that went with it.

Having a private studio to photograph in was a life dream of mine; so much that when we started seriously discussing the potential move to Oahu, my husband wasn’t sure it would be something I’d be able to leave behind. But if anything was going to complete with my love of photography, it would be Hawai’i.

After we settled into our permanent home, everything fell into place; with the exception of my photography studio wall art display. Not just photographs, these were canvases and prints I had personally hand stretched, matted, framed and painted myself. Stuffed in closets. Leaning against walls. Strategically placed under beds. It stung, knowing years and years of work, time, dedication, and money on these portraits weren’t being properly cared for but it was the best I could do.

Shortly after we arrived, I had the privilege of attending a meeting with Jen Dombroski, founder of the Dakota Lee Foundation and Sunny Chen, Executive Director of Healthy Mothers Healthy Babies Coalition of Hawai’i. As we talked about the birth community and how we each wanted to play a helpful role locally, Sunny mentioned, ‘Just a small thing I wish we could do for our Mother’s would be to spruce up our space. I wish it felt a little more welcoming - we need help.’

And just like that - my photographic art of breastfeeding moms, newborns with their families, and kids playing found a space to call home.

As the recipient of several non-profit outreach and government assistant programs when I was a young mother, I love opportunities to encourage any new or young mom to feel a little more at ease and comfortable. For me, this couldn’t have been a more perfect arrangement: rather than keep everything hidden and in storage, I was able to find purpose in where they stayed and, maybe in some way, encourage another woman to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Because while it’s a different story for a different day, the time between receiving help from agencies to creating these images were many, many years. But I’d like to hope in a small way it will resonate with someone that, even if it takes one decade at a time, a lot of life lies ahead.

Letter written to Healthy Mothers Healthy Babies Coalition of Hawai’i from Photographer and Birth Doula Teresa Robertson

Are you considering hiring a birth Photographer or Doula?

I would love to talk to you more! Not even sure what to ask? That’s ok too. Never hesitate to reach out to a Photographer to simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

Simply fill out this form and I will be in touch (and I will NEVER pass along your info - pinky swear).

When it comes to ‘what I do for a living’, it’s not uncommon for people to think of me with a camera or paintbrush in hand. Maybe a power tool here and there, you get the idea. From photography to framing, painting to…any other project that comes my way…It’s dawned on me recently how easy it is to portray the physical work I do on a day to day basis - and how challenging it’s been to allow people to view the completely other side of what I do in the world of Birth.

My journey of being a Birth Worker (Photographer and Doula) actually goes back a little over 7 years. Birth Photography was finally catching on as an art and appropriate way to reflect and heal; I also was introduced to the non profit organization, Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, where I volunteered my time and skill set to photograph newborns who did not survive pregnancy or the actual birth itself.

In the studio, I was beginning to photograph more and more newborns. Wanting to make sure I proved myself as more than just wanting to ‘take a pretty picture of a baby’, I was also pushing myself to make sure I was armed with some sort of new information to care for both newborn and parents; It was important to me that I actually care for my clients, not just rush them in and get them out.

One of many doula related books required to complete the DONA certification program in Hawaii.

Birth Photography came as naturally and welcomed as it possibly could; while I loved caring for the families I served behind the camera who had to mourn their children throughout the process of birth, catapulting myself into the other world of expectantly healthy births felt like a perfect balance. Looking back on my ‘first birth’, I remember chatting with the midwife I worked alongside of who said, ‘It rare you can find someone who can serve as a Doula and a Birth Photographer at the same time.’ When I explained that I wasn’t a Doula, she looked back at me, paused, and said, ‘You may want to consider that.’

“‘Teresa, I see people in this line of work come and go, pretending they are looking out for the best interest of these families, whether it’s nurses, doulas, midwives, OBGYNs, volunteers; but there’s something different about you - you actually deeply care for these people. You can see it all over you. That’s not the norm and families need that.’”

— A.O.

To be honest, I didn’t completely understand what exactly was expected of a Doula. Enter my dear friend, Heather of Maryland State Doulas, who I would sprinkle in questions to during our get togethers. While birth doesn’t need to be quite as complicated as we make it these days, it also goes without saying that this is a life changing event that I didn’t want to take lightly and just jump into. I also spoke with another friend (who is the the Head of Bereavement at the hospital I primarily served for Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep) about considering Doula work. I expected her to sort of brush off the role of Doulas altogether, so I was surprised when she said, ‘Teresa, I see people in this line of work come and go, pretending they are looking out for the best interest of these families, whether it’s nurses, doulas, midwives, OBGYNs, volunteers; but there’s something different about you - you actually deeply care for these people. You can see it all over you. That’s not the norm and families need that.’

Another beautiful baby born on the island of Oahu, Kapiolani Medical Center.

As I continued to intentionally consider and learn more about what my role could be in the Birth World, I simultaneously realized how invested I had actually already become; what some people saw as a ‘surprising’ addition to my photography, others took as an unnecessary declaration of sorts. It was the later group that I took to heart, since they were the professionals and experts in birth that already had confidence in me and what I had to offer.

Having said this, it is one thing to gain the trust from people I’ve worked with throughout the years - it’s another to ‘announce’ to the public my experience, passion, education, and how I look to be a positive asset to a parents birth team. But not talking about it also does nothing; so I’ve decided to begin here:

Aloha, my name is Teresa. I am a Photographer and Birth Doula.

ARe you considering a Doula - or just curious to learn more?

I would love to answer any questions you have! Not even sure what to ask? That’s ok too. Never hesitate to reach out to a Doula to simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

“I don’t understand these people who want Birth Photography. I gave birth and there is nothing about that experience I want to look back at!”

“You take pictures at births?! Like, people have a baby and want you there?! That’s weird.”

“OMG. Who would want pictures of them giving birth?! Hey honey! I’ve got an idea for this year’s holiday card!”

Birth Photography and Newborn Photography for D.C. Parents.

When I hear these phrases - which, I often do - I think to myself, “What a wonderful way to have experienced birth.” Because I am surrounded by parents who have struggled for years to become pregnant in the first place. Parents who have been told they would never have children. Parents who know their child will likely not survive long after birth. Parents who had no idea there was anything about to go horribly, horribly wrong.

I often see, unless you’ve been intimately touched by death, how the assumption of a healthy birth can be taken for granted. Photographs don’t matter.

But for those who have lived, or even had the scare, of a child’s life shortened, I am there. To celebrate with you. To love with you. To breath that sigh of relief with you. And, for some, to cry with you.

I often hear myself say, “Birth Photography isn’t for everyone”. Certainly, this is true. But for the parents it is for, I am proud, honored, and humbled to be at your service.

xo

Teresa

After birth, family bonding. The first family portrait. Birth Photography, D.C.

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture, and is proud to serve on The Queen’s Court.

One of the major misconceptions with Postpartum Depression (PPD) is the assumption that it is a short-term struggle. Much like the flu, it hits some harder than others, the time frame that you are ‘out of commission’ can vary, but overall, you bear through the worst of it until it’s finally time to get back to the daily grind.

Except sometimes the worst of it never goes away. Sometimes you never get better. Sometimes it leaves and comes back.

“Something is really wrong with me because you don’t hear people talk about postpartum depression starting and then staying like that.’” Said Chelsea Reiswig in an article posted by The Atlantic, When Postpartum Depression Doesn’t Go Away.

The article continues to discuss the the long term effects that PPD can have on an individual when it goes undiagnosed. Towards the end of the article, Reiswig states, “Now I have accepted this is likely something I will deal with the rest of my life...”.

The day I met Lorena ( Motherhood Unfiltered ) I knew there was something a little deeper behind that gorgeous smile. D.C., Baltimore, Annapolis, Atlanta, Oahu Photographer.

And if you think it’s hard for the individual themselves to try and grasp what is happening to their emotional, mental, and physical health, it can be just as complicated for professionals. “It is very difficult for a person, even a trained person, to be able to distinguish between regular frustrations, hormonal fluctuations, and a mood disorder,” says Nicole Washington, a Tulsa-based psychiatrist.

I sincerely think this is why the discussion of what happens around birth - before birth, during birth, after birth - needs to be recognized as something that is not shushed and discarded. If we aren’t even near the point of being able to pinpoint and recognize certain challenges, the furthest thing from helping that is throwing up our hands, saying ‘Yep. That sucks.’ and changing the topic.

Laurena talks about her struggles after birth in her article, The Truth Behind the Photo . Newborn, Birth, Maternity photography serving the D.C., Atlanta, Annapolis, Baltimore, Oahu areas.

When I recognized that writing about the topic of Postpartum Depression was something that I felt was a necessary, I envisioned it to be a three part series: capturing the perspective of a postpartum mother I knew, sharing a piece of my own experience, and finding one article that may share some insight on this highly complex issue. Having come to what I loosely assumed would be the ‘end’ of this topic, I am reconsidering that my time exploring this is ‘done’.

I am well aware that this is not a topic that is going to be enjoyed by many; however, I am going to take the ‘quality over quantity’ approach with these writings, in the hopes that a few may be encouraged to recognize signs and symptoms within themselves or someone they know.

So, let’s keep the conversation going, so that we may feel joy, share joy, raise joy, and leave a legacy of joy.

Xo

Teresa

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture, and is proud to serve on The Queen’s Court.

Did you know? 1 in 7 Moms and 1 in 10 Dads suffer from postpartum depression. Reaching out to speak with someone is the best way to help determine what path is best for you. Consider reaching out to Postpartum International Support by calling 1.800.944.4773, texting 503.894.9453 or visitinghttp://www.postpartum.net/

Dear Friend with Postpartum Depression Who Doesn’t Think She Has Postpartum Depression,

I don’t know if you see yourself. But I see you. And I’m scared for you.

Why?

Because I’ve been there. And I almost didn’t make it out alive. I know, I know - this is different for you. It was for me, too. I could get out of bed. I could fake the smile - hell, once in awhile I even had a genuine smile. I changed my cloth diapered baby, cooked dinner from scratch, posted all the pretty pictures on Instagram; if you could see a physical example of a ‘functioning post-birth mother’, I can assure you, I was what you were looking for. I even filled out that 6 week checkup form with flying colors because, I mean...come on.

I made sure no one could see me inside.

Eight weeks postpartum, at the pumpkin patch with my family. The meltdown in the middle of Whole Foods afterwards is memorable.

I had been told about the ‘scary, spooky PPD’ stories. What I was feeling wasn’t anything quite like I had heard, so at the time I thought that wasn’t what I was going through. Whatever it was, I was ‘just was in a funk’. Something I needed to adjust my attitude in the bathroom quickly and then continue to take on the day. After all, I was just adjusting. I was just tired. I was just...failing.

I want you to know that Postpartum Depression is SO difficult to see and define, that if you *are* struggling, you will likely not fit nice and neat into a predetermined box. And like an abusive relationship, it will be easy to make excuses, brush off ‘isolated’ incidents, and accept the voice in your head that keeps apologizing, saying ‘It will never be this way again. That was the last time. I promise.’

No, I can’t see your soul. Maybe I’m way off base. But if the fact that I see even a glimmer of me in you scares the hell of me. I don’t want this pain for you and I wish I could do more. A side effect of not getting help when it is needed means that this can have life-long, lasting effects; so, yes, I am coming to you as a person who has never completely healed - and as someone who is begging you to consider a different path.

I  want you to know that I see you, I feel with you, and I. LOVE. YOU. I may not be able to heal you but I still want you to know you can come to me and just be. Not the ‘You’ pre baby, not the ‘You’ you thought you would be post baby - the You that you are right now.

I need you. I need you to be honest with me. I need you to be honest with yourself. With your significant other. Your doctor. With anyone and everyone who will listen. Maybe we won’t all understand and we may make mistakes. I just want you to know it’s all with good intention, with the attempt of showing you how much we love you.

Just please don’t wait.

Three weeks postpartum, first family outing with my newborn, Washington D.C.

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture, and is proud to serve on The Queen’s Court.

A Three Part Series Part III

To conclude this short series on Birth Photography, I would love to address some of the (many) questions we receive in the industry. If you think I’ve missed one, I would love to know - let’s keep the conversation going!

Birth Photography in Maryland, DC, and Virginia

Birth Photography, Newborn Photography, & Hospital Photography: What’s the Difference?

There are certainly a lot of choices when it comes to Photography, no matter the occasion; to be honest, it can be pretty overwhelming and unless you are ‘in the know’ you may not even be sure what you really want.

To put it simply:

Newborn Photography would be having someone photograph your newborn(s) shortly after birth, usually between 5-10 days old (we will cover why that young in a later post). These session can be in a studio or in your own home, posed or not.

Hospital or ‘Fresh’ Photography generally refers to a Photographer coming to where you have given birth at within 24-48 hours. If you are interested in capturing documentary or ‘lifestyle’ images during these first precious hours, this may be a good choice for you.

Birth Photography often captures the time when active labor starts, through the birth, and a short time after the birth. Contrary to initial thought, it may or may not involve photos of pushing, depending on what each client wants. Strength, love, and bonding tends to be the focus of these photographs.

Doulas, Midwives, and Family during a home birth in Maryland

Why Would Anyone Want Birth Photography?

There are MANY reasons why people choose to hire a Birth Photographer, there are just a few:

• Some people would rather have a more intimate birth experience without family or friends in the room, while some may want their family and friends to be free to focus their energy on supporting you.

• Similar to a wedding, this may be a be a special, emotional, or spiritual moment for you and your new family.

• You would like to make sure, after all of your hard work, that you are able to look back and see what your birth journey really looked like and the beauty of it.

How is Birth Photography beneficial?

Birth Photography can be extremely beneficial, not only as a reminder to yourself how amazing you are but also to remember the positive experience of having given birth.

Birth Photography in Times of Distress

Unfortunately, not every pregnancy will progress the same. If you are experiencing a pregnancy that has complicated circumstances surrounding, please know that you and your baby are just as important. I encourage you to reach out to your birth team as to how Birth Photography may be beneficial to your healing process.

Laboring in Annapolis, Maryland at a Birthing Center

Will having a Birth Photographer make it feel as though my room is too ‘crowded’?

That is something only you can decide but also one of the reasons why I insist on spending a good amount of time getting to know my birth clients before the birth. If I feel that my presence is going to be anything other than subtle, calming, or positive, I may even suggest another Photographer in the industry that would bring a different energy to your environment. At the end of the day, you having a positive, healthy birth is my top priority.

How much does Birth Photography typically cost?

It really depends. Experience, talent, and time are just a few items that go into how Photographers price themselves. I once had a client say to me, ‘It’s like you’re a Wedding Photographer - but on call for weeks at a time.’ Which is so true! Different regions will also present their own range of cost but I would generally expect to pay between $1,200 - $3,000.

* * *

Have more questions? I would love to answer them! Never hesitate to reach out to a Photographer to simply discuss what your options are, how you may be able to work together, and see who may be the best fit for you. There are many of us who truly want to see you well taken care of and have your best interest at heart.

I hope you’ve enjoyed this series and follow along with future posts.

Birth Photography, like the actual maternity and labor, has less to do with one specific moment and more about a story of strength, surrender, and everything in between.

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture, and is proud to serve on The Queen’s Court.

A Three Part Series Part II

Birth Story, Annapolis, Maryland

One of the top three questions I receive in regards to Birth Photography (especially from soon to be Dad’s) is, ‘Who in the world would want to see these photos?! I’m certainly not posting these on our Holiday Cards!’

If you promise to keep reading and allow me to explain, I’ll tell you a little secret: Maybe you will post a few photos for family and friends to see.

But let’s back up a bit.

Labor and Delivery can be beautiful. Birth Photography in Maryland

First and foremost, whatever you choose to do with your images is up to you (and no, I will not be posting your intimate moments for the world to see. I can assure you, I would not still be in business if I made a habit out of breaking that kind of trust with my clients). Contrary to school pictures and formal wedding portraits, these moments are a gift to yourself. No one else. This is an opportunity for you to focus on what your body needs to do during labor, your partner to focus on your needs, and for you to look back at it all with a clear mind and a positive outlook of your own, personal miracle.

Whether you have a vaginal, c-section, hospital, vbac, or home birth, your mind is going to be on strength of your body and the health of your newborn baby - it is by no means a selfish or ‘weird’ desire to remember the details surrounding the love you have created.

Now, having said all of this, let me get back to posting your Birth Photography images on your Holiday Cards (yes, we are allowed to have a sense of humor in the Birth World).

When it comes to how you give birth, you have an abundance of choices: Give birth at home or hospital? Medication or no medication? Doula, Midwife, OBGYN? Water, woods, or bed?

That is why it is important to know when hiring a Birth Photographer, you also have many choices.

Family bonding after birth. Birthing Center in Maryland

Do some of my clients want every single detail - and I mean, ALLLLLLLL the details - of their birth story documented? Yes; and they are beautiful. But do I also have clients who simply want the labor and immediate post delivery photographed? Absolutely; and they are beautiful. The bottom line is, everyone’s birth journey is just as important and special.

Because there are so many choices, feelings, and ‘backup plans’ involved in birth, is one of the reasons I spend so much time talking with my clients before hand. We discuss comfort levels, birth plans, expectations, and boundaries. I also make sure your birth team - especially your partner - is supportive of my being there.

Whether you are new to the idea of Birth Photography, considering if it is right for you, or simply curious to know more, I encourage you to reach out to multiple people in the birth world (such as Maryland State Doulas), on your birth team, or myself. In the meantime, please join me on FAQ Fridays where we will be discussing Birth Photography, in addition to newborn, self care, and other life topics surrounding women and motherhood.

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture, and is proud to serve on The Queen’s Court.

I’ve never been one to be big on New Year’s resolutions. But as I’ve spent the last several days focusing on organizing, purging, and refocusing on what’s important to me, I can’t help but be excited for what this new year is about to bring. Certainly influenced by my time in the Hawaiian culture, it’s been wonderful and refreshing to see positive changes organically happen rather then going against the grain.

While many focus on change with each New Year, I am resolving to do the opposite: Embrace myself.

Birth Photography isn’t always the medical documentation that people initially think of. D.C.

One of the biggest lessons I learned through the community, island, and people of Oahu is that I’m not alone in my passions, my thoughts, or my dreams. I’ve actually been trying to mold all of what makes me ‘Me’ into everyone else’s ideals, rules, or standards. I’m starting to wonder if this has been the broken link the entire time.

Having said that, I have started each new project over the last several asking myself:

• Does this involve a quality product?

• Does it empower, embrace, or enhance women?

Bonding with Baby after Birth. Washington, DC

Commiting to these two goals is my own sort of project, and yet one that never was absent. It shows in my Birth Photography, Newborn Sessions, Breastfeeding Portraits, and Child Photos. In the next several weeks, I’m excited to collaborate even more with both Maryland State Doulas and Newborn Sleep co. Come March, you’ll see me at the Maryland Families for Safe Birth expo Baltimore Birth Festival (keep up do date on the event with this link), showcasing the gentle side of Birth Photography you may not have seen before. Fingers crossed I’ll be making an appearance in Oahu again this spring.

Like I said, I’m not usually one to mark January as a ‘time for renewal’...but coincidently, I think it fits well this year.

See you soon!

xo

Teresa

Teresa Robertson received her Bachelor’s of Fine Art degree in Photography and Fine Art Illustration from the Savannah College of Art and Design. After serving as a volunteer for several years with Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, she became interested in Birth Photography and Birth Doula (DONA) work as well. She soulfully resides on the island of Oahu, is passionate about preserving the land and culture, and is proud to serve on The Queen’s Court.